I MISS YOU :(

Second, Minutes, Days, Weeks and Month has passed. YES, I MUST ADMIT. I Miss you, I just don’t know if I still love you. Been crying lots of times and I had done something I never did in my entire life. Maybe, You are my world for quite a time but I guess it’s the right time to make myself realize that everything is over since the 24th of july. Right? Well, I just wanna say “I Love You” and I am not asking you to say you love me too. Okay? Just like this song I know that that though I am willing to do everything for you, I know it will never be enough to have you back. and BTW, If you read this, Uhm? I doubt you will. Lol. But if that time happens, I guess and I really do hope, I already moved on. Just wanna say Thank you. Sorry. I love you and Goodbye. :)

SOBRANG SAKIT NA :(

Nagpapakatanga sa bagay na kahit kelan hindi naman naging kanya, pilit ibinabalik ang bagay na hindi naman nagkaron ng titulo pero sobrang minahal ng todo. Ilang beses nang pinagsinungalingan pero lahat pinaniwalaan. Lahat ng imposible binigyan ng daan at katuparan. Yung nasanay ka na araw-araw pangalan nya ang nakikita mo sa cellphone mo at messages mo. Nasanay kang laging syang nandyan para sayo per dahil lang sa lintik na distansyang pumagitna sa inyo at sa isang taong nakasama nya sa madaling panahon lahat yun ay nakalimutan na. Masakit pero kailangang tanggapin. katulad ng lyrics ng kantang to, DAHAN DAHAN MONG BITAWAN ANG PUSO KONG DI MAKALABAN DAHIL MINSANG MONG INIWAN LABIS NA NAHIHIRAPAN” kahit masakit kailangang tanggapin na hindi porke’t masaya ka sa isang bagay o sa isang tao ay forever ng ganon, dapat maging handa tayo sa maraming bagay na pwedeng mangyare dahil pag ang inisip natin ay mga puro positibo lamang at mas malaki ang chance na mas masasaktan tayo kasi nag expect tayo, kasi nag assume tayo. Walang magagawa, NAGMAMAHAL LANG PO :)

AT THE END OF THE DAY..

I’m happy all day! Surrounded with friends, classmates, peers and newly acquaintances. Happy thoughts are on my way. Good vibes gently walks on. Laughs are all over the air. Smiles cover up my face. I was filled with happiness and tight bond. But, at the end of the day. Tears came falling down. Sadness hugged me so tight that I can’t barely breath. Pain filled my room. Emptiness is all over my visage. NEEDING YOU. WANTING YOU. MISSING YOU. 

ONE STEP CLOSER. (Forward? Backward?)

Sa last post ko, nasabi kong Masaya na talaga ako kasi that’s what I really felt days ago, pero this night, parang nag-iba na naman? Dunno but I felt something which cuts my heart again tonight? Umiiwas na ko pero sa tuwing magkakaron ng pagkakataong magtagpo ang landas natin, hindi ko pa din mapigilang magparamdam. Well, I know part yon ng process pero hindi ko mapigilan ang sarili ko sa mga bagay na alam kong mapapalapit ulit ako sayo. Sa simula iiwas ako tapos piigilan ko ang sarili kong mainvolve sa anything na about sayo pero in the end, gagawin ko pa rin naman. Gumagawa ako ng paraan para mapalayo sayo pero sa huli, mapapalapit lang ulit ako. Hindi ko alam kung tadhana gumagawa ng paraan, masyadong korni para maniwala sa mga bagay na ganon pero at times, parang gusto kong maniwala e. Kung tutuusin madali lang naman talaga akong makakaiwas sayo e pero may mga certain times na parang pinaglalapit na talaga tayo ng fate? Ewan ko ba. Ang ayoko lang yung makita ulit kita sa personal kasi alam ko baka bumalik lahat ng nararamdaman ko para sayo. Baka pag nakita ulit kita hindi ko mapigilan ang sarili ko. Baka mahalin ulit kita. Baka magmukha lang akong tanga. Pero kahit ilang beses kong ipilit sa sarili ko na iwasan ka, wag lumapit sa mga bagay na pdeng magkonekta satin there’s just a part of me na nagsasabing “malay mo pde pa?” hindi ko na talaga maintindihan sarili ko. Sana maging okay na lahat.

SINGLE. HAPPY. CONTENTED.

If you’re going to ask me now if how am I. I’ll be happy to answer you, “I’M FINE. :)” plus a real smile on my face. Yes, I know deep inside me I’m alright. Right now, I’m happy being around my friends which serves as my inspiration. They are the ones whom I know will never leave me because in real friendship, there is no such thing as “break-up”. I enjoy their company and everytime I’m with them, I forget all the painful feelings inside my heart. They are the reason of my smile and laughs. They are the names on my inbox, facebook wall posts, comment box and twitter interactions. They’re always there when I need them and I knew, our friendship will last. Because of them, I almost forgot the cut inside my heart. ♥

TOO MANY THINGS TO BE BUSY ABOUT. ;)

MYSELF, Studies, tumblr, twitter, facebook, plurk, wattpad, skype, volleyball, friends, classmates, assignments, projects, quizzes, gimiks, hang-outs, cellphone, professors, family, allowance, transportation, crushes, haters, suitors, tours. These are the things I’m busy about and because of these, I HAVE NO MORE TIME FOR ALL THE DRAMAS CAUSED BY THE EFFIN LOVELIFE. ;)

SANA. :(

Madami na kasing nagbago. Di porke’t ganon kayo noon, ganon pa din hanggang ngayon. Lahat naman ng tao nagbabago lalo na’t pag nasaktan mo ng todo. :l

Yung sa sobrang sakit na, manhid ka na sa salitang pagmamahal :l Kahit alam mo at ramdam mo na talagang mahal mo sya, may isang parte sayo na parang umaayaw na lang, na parang nagdidikta na wag na lang sya. Kapag kasi kahit gaano mo kamahal ang isang tao noon, kapag naranasan mo na yung sakit dahil sa kanya, hindi ka na magiging katulad nung dati. Kahit gustong gusto mong ibialik yung dating kayo, kahit gustong gusto mong maramdaman yung dating pagmamahal mo sa kanya, hindi mo magawa, siguro isang dahilan na din na nadala ka na pero para sakin, ang pinaka dahilan ay yung sakit na naramdaman mo dahil sa kanya at yung tiwalang inubos at sinayang lang nya. Yung pakiramdam na pilit mong kinukumbinsi yung sarili mo na mahal na mahal mo pa rin sya, alam mo din deep inside na hindi na kasing tindi ng pagmamahal mo dati. Madami na kasing nagbago e, nasaktan ka na e. Kumbaga, kahit gumaling yung sugat nandun pa din naman yung peklat. :/

MAHAL MO SYA. MAHAL KA NYA. SAPAT NA KAYA YON? </3

I never expected things would end this way. I love you so much that I’m willing to give you up. I will never be that selfish girl and sacrifice your happiness just to get mine. Honestly, I never thought this would happen to us. Well I guess, even the happiest fairytales still has its ending, Happy or not, together or apart. Unfortunately, our ending came out as an unhappy and apart one. If you are happier with her, I guess I can’t do anything about it anymore. You had your decision and you chose her. Even if it hurt so much, I’ll try to smile and show everyone I’m okay. For YOU, I will always find way to understand pain. I LOVE YOU AND GOODBYE. :l

I LOVE YOU :(

Maybe, I love you this much and even how much pain I feel and how many tears I burst, I will always accept your sorry and I will always stick with you. No matter what other people will tell me, they can never dictate my heart to stop loving you. I loved you, I love you and I will always love you. :”>

Ganun nga pala talaga pag sobrang Mahal mo yung isang tao. Yung siyam na daliri mo nakabitaw na sa kanya pero yung isa, nakakapit pa at umasang hilahin ka nya at maayos ang lahat. Mas gugustuhin ko pang hindi ko na lang alam yung mga nangyayare sayo. Yung hindi ko na lang nababasa yung mga sinasabe mo sa iba atleast wala na kong dahilan para masaktan. Hindi na lang ako magtatanong kung sino yung ibang nakikita ko sa accounts mo para di mo na kelangan pang sabihin yung totoo. Hindi ko na itatanong sayo kung sino yung mga nakakakasama mo araw-araw, mas gugustuhin ko na lang na hindi ko alam  kesa naman mas lalo akong masaktan. Maniniwala na lang ako sa mga bagay na sinasabe mo saken kesa mag-away pa tayo pag pinagdudahan pa kita. Hindi na lang din kita paulit ulit na tatanungin ng mga bagay na sobrang gusto kong malaman, para if ever hindi mo na kelangang magsinungaling sakin. Lahat yan gagawin ko kasi para sakin, mas ok na yung paminsan minsang pag iyak ko nang dahil sayo kesa naman mawala ka sakin. Lahat ng sakit titiisin ko wag ka lang umalis, wag mo lang akong iwanan. Ganun kita Mahal. Sobra pa sa apaw. Kahit anong sakit pa maramdaman ko hindi pa din yun magiging sapat para matakpan yung pagmamahal ko sayo. Hindi ko kaya na mawala ka sakin kahit pa paulit ulit kong marinig sa ibang tao yung mga salitang “ang tanga tanga mo” at “madami pa jang iba” Kahit pa ilang daan, libo o milyong beses kong marinig yang mga salitang yan ikaw pa din ang mamahalin ko, ikaw pa din yung pipiliin ko. At katulad ng kantang ito, KUNG MERONG MAGTANONG TUNGKOL SA AKIN, SABIHIN MO… OK LANG AKO. :|

THANK YOU FOR THE BROKEN HEART :”“”>

“Everything I know about love I learned from you and everything I know about pain I learned from you. You were my only, you were my first. You showed me lonely and you took me in when I was hurt. But the most important thing you ever game me was the one that hurt the most.”

All I ever felt before was hatred, anger and betrayal. Almost every night, I always burst out in tears in taking the truth that you already had someone else and that promise of ours will just stay in words and will never come into life. Everyday, I always hope that everything will be fine. In just one snap, I can have you back… I can return those times when you are still mine. Everything I knew now is because of you. All the hurt, pain and worries I felt, it is because of you :”>

“ SO THANK YOU FOR THE BROKEN HEART AND THANK YOU FOR THE PERMANENT SCAR. ‘CAUSE IF IT WASN’T FOR YOU, I MIGHT FORGET HOW IT FEELS TO LET GO AND HOW IT FEELS TO GET A BRAND NEW START. SO THANK YOU FOR THE BROKEN HEART :)”

I had a big realization on every pain you caused me. God has given me real eyes to realize real lies. You caused me the pain I will never forget. This scar in my heart will always be here. But for that, I just wanna say “Thank You” for all these things you made me feel. It made me stronger and it made me realize that I could be much happier that I am when you’re still with me. Thank you for the chance to have a brand new start. A better life. A better me :)

“I still remember when you called and said that she didn’t mean anything. How could you expect me to look at you? You were my only but not my last. You showed me lonely and you made me put you in the past. But the most important thing you ever gave me was the one that hurt the most. And everytime I find myself alone in pieces. I find myself. I’ll just remember when you hurt me and I made it.”

I remember that time when you said that she means nothing to you. My bad, I believed it. I believe every little thing you say without any hesitations. I love you that much thinking you will never lie to me. You caused me so much pain, but luckily after two years… I’ve learned to overcome all those pain and release all my anger and hatred. I am much stronger now and I thank you for that =)

“SO THANK YOU FOR THE BROKEN HEART AND THANK YOU FOR THE PERMANENT SCAR. ‘CAUSE IF IT WASN’T FOR YOU I WOULDN’T BE HERE WITH THE LOVE OF MY LIFE, ALL MY PAIN DISAPPEAR. I’VE COME SO FAR SO THANK YOU FOR THE BROKEN HEART.”

All the hurt came as a blessing in disguise. All of the pain suddenly became my strength. At last, after a long time, I moved on. :) I finally learned to smile without any pain in my heart. I just want to say thank you for letting me go because I got the chance to be with somebody else now. Someone who loves me as much as I do, someone who I believe that will never leave my side with no reason at all. I am now full happy with my HIM <3 I Love Him So Much :)))) SORRY AND GOODBYE. Thank you for the broken heart. Thank you for all the heartaches you caused. Thank you for all the memories we shared. :”””>

Always remember, I'm still here :">

Baby, don’t you ever think that you’re alone. Always remember that I’m always here for you no matter what. Don’t you ever think also that nobody is with you. Look inside you heart baby, I’m here! <3 I will never ever leave you even when everybody else does. I will always stay by your side no matter how many problems will come. I will always listen to every worries and complaints you have. Let me be your partner in fighting and facing all your problems. I’ll never leave you behind even when the world already turns their back on you. I will always be that one person you can always count on to. Without a word, I will just hug and kiss you and hope that everything will be fine. I love you baby! :*

COZ. IT'S YOU AND ME. :">

Every time i’m with you, there is no other person I could possibly think of to occupy your place. You are the perfect person I could be with. You’re the perfect face my heart sees. Your voice is the only sound I hear. Your eyes and stares are the only presence I can feel and you are the only person I can ever think of loving this much :”> I just want you to know that no matter what happens to us, I will always love you and I will always be here for you even if you need me or not. :) You will always have a part of my heart or if you want to, you can have it whole :”> FOUR WORDS. TWELVE LETTERS. “I Love You Baby.”

BOTTOMLINE ♥

Some boys want to have me. They are near, one call ahead and I can always be with them but I will never ever replace you. Though you’re far I know deep down you were always with me. Right here in my heart. <3 I chose you not because I want to but because I felt you. I love you not because of who you are but because of who I am when I’m with you. I’m holding on with you not because I just want to but because I love you. Bottom line? I’m doing this because I LOVE YOU. :”>

Coz. its YOU ♥

No words can express how much I love you. I am longing to hug and kiss you everyday but unfortunately, distance contradicts. I miss you so much and as days pass, I’m missing you more. I believe that we can survive this long distance relationship as long as we have our trust and loyalty to each other because I believe that love itself is not enough to make a relationship work, grow and last. I will always be true to you no matter how many gorgeous faces I will meet and encounter. My heart is yours and it will always be yours. Always remember that baby. I love you so so much way beyond you know it :”>

NTH REASON WHY I LOVE HIM

The guy who calls me for no reason at all. Those endless topics we share. Those hands that perfectly fit mine. Those tight hugs and warm embraces. Those cuddles we do. Those sweet kisses of yours. Those looks in your eyes that melts my heart. Those sweet messages which made may heart skip a beat. Those tears we shed for some times. Those long conversations we always do. Those funny moments everywhere. Those mall times and trips. Those walking and sweet talks we did. Those unexpected ‘banats’ we always come up with. Those surprises you did. Those memories of ours. I MISS IT ALL BABY! : “> How I wish I could just jump there just to be with you. I LOVE YOU FOR NTH REASON AT ALL :****

I WANT YOU TO KNOW...

As long as we can see the same sky, breathe the same air, step on the same planet then you and I will always be together and I will never ever stop loving you :”>

AND THE REASON IS BECAUSE I LOVE YOU.

Here comes the test of distance. I don’t know how long can I hold on to this kind of relationship. It’s really hard when the person you love is afar from you. There comes the time when you just want to kiss them, hug them and cuddle them but you can’t simply because he’s away. But baby, one thing I assure you is I will always be true and loyal to you. I stay in this situation simply because I LOVE YOU. I get mad when I see something wrong with you simply because I LOVE YOU and I get jealous everytime I see and read something on your online accounts simply because I LOVE YOU. Everything I do, there is only one reason for it and that reason is BECAUSE I LOVE YOU. Each morning as I wake up and each night before I go to sleep, I always think one name and that name is YOURS. I always look forward for those days we can see each other again and make another moment to be miss. :) Although sometimes, we have our misunderstandings, shortcomings and a little fight let us always find ways to make it up to each other. I will never give you up for just short time happiness. I love you and I will always will. 

I LOVE YOU.

When things get awfully tiring, let us allow ourselves to pause for a while and take a rest. There is no such thing as “perfect relationship”. Trials and problems may occur but it is never a reason to give up. Distance is just a mere word in a dictionary. Let us not make it come to life and ruin our relationship. Trust is a big word but I am willing to give it to you. I wanna kiss you, hug you and cuddle you everyday. Each morning, as I wake up, I never fail to check my phone to see if you remember me. Everyday, one new message coming from the only person I love… coming from you. Everytime I say “I LOVE YOU” I really mean it. Baby, I always find lots and lots of reasons to stay in love and be more in love with you each day. Sorry for the times you thought I had someone else, They were just my friends… nothing more, nothing less. I know there is no officially “US” but for me… you will always be MY ONLY ONE. I never want to think negative thoughts that might happen when distance is between us, but one thing I assure you is “no matter how many handsome faces around me, I may look at them for a minute, but in the end… I will always stare at the only perfect face my heart sees… YOURS <3” Each time I look in your eyes, my heart never fails to skip a beat and if I had given a chance to be with someone else, I will always stick with you. MY HEART; MY PRINCE; MY EVERYTHING… <3 PMS

ran out of words to say.

When conversations got dreary, it doesn’t mean I ran out of words to say. It simply means no words can depict what I feel whenever your around me. Lips maybe stitched yet my heart is widely open for someone who’s willing to be part of me. I’ve been longing to have someone for real. Someone whom I can call mine and only mine.